When your relative offers you money and you pretend like you can't take it at first

Me pretending to be listening to somebody's boring story

My dreams are weird

Well-deserved reward for me and my bestie

So I come home from work and my wife says to me

A baby's laughter is one of the most beautiful sounds you will ever hear

When you see your Ex posting status about true love, loyalty and emotions

Parents when you laugh once after you missed school for being sick

My brain two seconds after I lock a door