I am making an omelette
Home is where you trust the toilet seat
Me: *texts my dad an important life update*
Today's gonna be a great day
Me before clicking "pay now"
When are you going to give us grandkids?
Try not to cry!
14 days in the supermarket VS 2 days in my house
When you see your dad do this, you know he's about to finesse the hell out of that reverse
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